Just Breathe

Did I say that I need you?
Oh, did I say that I want you?
Oh, if I didn’t I’m a fool you see…
No one knows this more than me.
–Just Breathe by Pearl Jam

It really is the little things in life that make us the happiest.  The way the sun shines through the window in the morning, a good song blasting through your headphones, a perfect batch of cupcakes. This is what I am so thankful this week–the chance to sit back and actually think about these things.  It’s something that I forget to do all too often.  Calling my dad every time I board a plane to ask him if he got the pizza, a good cup of coffee, a night in front of the tv with the housemates. These are the kinds of things that make life so beautiful.  And in the midst of all the tests, papers, and projects, I need these small reminders to give myself that extra push to finish strong.  A song that describes your mood perfectly, a warm spring day, a skype chat from the family, reminders of great memories, thoughts of spring break, laughing with friends, a great dinner. The list goes on and on, and there is something simply wonderful about that fact.

Sights and Sounds

I took it all in and buried it deep underground.
I never thought i would need to remember those sights or those sounds.
–Sights and Sounds by The Rocketboys

“The worst deception we practice is on ourselves.  Which is why sometimes it takes awhile to realize that the truth has been in front of us the whole time.”–Meredith Grey

Who knew that Grey’s Anatomy could sum up my life right now in just two sentences?  I’ve wrestled with this thought so often lately.  Am I deceiving myself?  Is the truth right in front of me?  Or am I right to keep following this path I’ve been walking down?  Or, better yet, is it all the same thing?

Maybe these questions are better left unanswered.  Or maybe they’ll be answered over time.  We just have to do the best we can with what we have.  I just have to do the best I can with what I have.

Keep it loose, keep it tight

But sometimes,
We forget what we got, who we are.
Oh who are are not.
I think we gotta chance, to make it right.
Keep it loose, keep it tight.

Sometimes we forget who we got,
Who they are.
Oh, who they are not.
There is so much more in love,
Than black and white.
–Keep It Loose, Keep it Tight by Amos Lee

 

It’s funny how the clock moves on.  Here’s to the beginning of an end.

All At Sea

I’m all at sea
Where no-one can bother me
Forgot my roots
If only for a day
Just me and my thoughts sailing far away
Like a warm drink it seeps into my soul
Please just leave me right here on my own
Later on you could spend some time with me
If you want to
All at sea
–All At Sea by Jamie Cullum

Right now I am on a desert island.  There is no stress, no worries, and no panicking.  Just the warm sun, crystal clear waves, and beautiful sand.  Right now everything is perfect.  I do not have a care in the world.  I can only relax and sleep under the sun.  Right now it’s just me, my wandering thoughts, and my music.

These past two weeks have been particularly busy and crazy and I know that these next two weeks will be even more so.  Between recording, producing, rehearsing, and planning for tour, there leaves little time for anything else.  My life is now compartmentalized by lists.  My desktop is filled with post-it after post-it of things I need to accomplish.

Needless to say, life goes on.  Days will be busy and things will get pushed to the side, but at the end of the day I need to be joyful.  It’s the bottom line things like joy that really matter.

So right now I am on a desert island.

Poison and Wine

I don’t have a choice but I still choose you
Oh I don’t love you but I always will
-Poison and Wine by The Civil Wars

Every morning we wake up with expectations.  We expect that our day will go a certain way, that we will feel a certain way, we will eat a certain food, or wear a certain outfit.  Whether we realize it or not, we always have some sort of expectations.  The question that I’ve been thinking about lately is “How often do those expectations pan out the way we want them to?  How often do our days go according to plan?”  And I think I’ve found the answer, at least an answer for my own life.

I believe that no matter how hard we try, our expectations are going to disappoint us.  Because they are our expectations.  I don’t wake up in the morning thinking that “this is the day I want to fight with my friends” or “today I’m going to screw up royally at work.”  I wake up thinking that today is going to be a good day.  But how often does that attitude change from the time we get out of bed to the time when we crawl back into it at the end of the day?  Too often.  So many of my bad days have ended with me thinking that I did not expect this or that to happen today.

Sometimes there is nothing we can do to change the situations we face each day.  We can only change the outlook we have on theses situations.  Easier said than done, right?

I am a master at running my own life.  Therefore my day never goes according to plan.  You would think that I would learn.  You would think.

Top of the World

I think I broke the wings
Off a little songbird
And she’s never gonna fly
To the top of the world
Now

Gonna grab a hold
Of that little songbird
And take her for a ride
To the top of the world
Right now
To the top of the world
-Top of the World by Patty Griffin

So I’m two weeks into my best semester.  I think it’s a little funny that I’m in this program called Best Semester because I really do believe that this is the best semester.  I love my classes, enjoying doing my homework (the minimal amount that I get), and am constantly surrounded by wonderful people.

Week 1 was wild.  We went on field trips for a better part of the week, including EMI CMG, Charlie Peacock’s house, and the Americana Music Festival.  I bought tickets to possibly the best concert ever: B.O.B., Snoop-Dog, and Passion Pit.  Get it.  A bunch of us went to a bar concert and discovered this crazy band called The Blackfoot Gypsies.  We will be going to as many of their concerts this semester.

Week 2 was our first show for CMC live.  My artist, the wonderful Lisa Walters, performed and I got to step in last minute as producer.  The week was hectic and busy but I loved every minute of it.  We discovered the wonderful parts of East Nashville and I added a great dress and tshirt to my clothing collection.

Well I’m off to the wonderful world of rehearsals, drawing, and baking cream puffs.  I’m sorry this is a short update on my life.  I love and miss you all terribly.

Check it out:

http://www.brokedoc.com/

No One’s Gonna Love You-Band of Horses
You’ve Got The Love-Florence and The Machine
Corner-Allie Moss
Bushwick Blues-Delta Spirit
Top of the World-Patty Griffin
Thieves-She and Him
I’ll Be in The Sky-B.o.b
Don’t Let me Fall-B.o.b
Worry About you-2am club

The Blackfoot Gypsies

Lisa and I at the Five for Fighting concert

Ariel and I at the Coliseum in Nashville

We’re friends.  Obvi.

East Nashville at its finest

Hello Goodbye

You say goodbye and I say hello
Hello, hello
I don’t know why you say goodbye
I say hello

Why, why, why, why, why, why
Do you say good bye
Goodbye, bye, bye, bye, bye
-Hello Goodbye by The Beatles

I am definitely a small town girl.  When I was in high school and deciding on college, I remember thinking how far away Pittsburgh felt from Quarryville.  I remember hating Pittsburgh (mostly for its sports teams) but also loving it because of what it could soon represent for me.  Four years later (really four already???), I’m taking a train from Pittsburgh back to that small town and feel so much love for this city, something I never thought I would say.  It holds so many memories, both good and bad.  I’ve had some of my favorite days in that city.  And now I’m leaving it.  Not for good, definitely not for good.  This city is too great to not come back to.    But I’m going, none the less.  I’m off to another town, another city.  And I will never forget how nothing will compare to the days I spent in Pittsburgh.

I’m definitely scared.  I’m left my geneva family this morning and I’m leaving my biological family in a mere 3 days.  As happy as I am that this summer is dead and gone (get it T.I.), it means weird endings and new unfamiliar beginnings.  I have absolutely no idea what I’m getting myself into, which was definitely brought to the surface numerous times during my short visit to Geneva.  But there is something truly beautiful about trusting in the unknown. It’s one of those things that you can’t quite place your finger on where the beauty lies or what will come from it, but you know it’s there.  And I take comfort in that.  And then I’m not scared.

I guess I’m feeling a bit nostalgic.  Don’t forget about me Pittsburgh.  Imma coming back.